Life By The Way

WITH YOU

I was thinking this morning about times in my life God did something so specific that it was as impactful as if he had spoken out loud. For me those times have been more powerful than just God “whispering,” or giving me a “wink and a nod.” One instance I recall involved an ordinary object that I must have seen many times before, but had not noticed in detail.

It was 2007, and my maternal Grandmother had just passed away at the age of 98. She was the meek yet powerful matriarch of the family, having raised 6 children almost singlehandedly. Sadly, my Grandfather was ill for much of his adult life, so hers was a life that was filled with challenges not faced by many women of that day. However, her faith was the backbone of her life and family, and while she wasn’t a “preachy” person, there was no doubt that her source of strength came from the Lord, and the truth she found in the pages of her well worn bible. Her strong faith and gentle way of living had a profound effect on me, and no doubt her influence can be seen in how I live my life today. Her passing was a process, and during that time she seemed to be “in between” this world and the next, but that is a story for another day.

Our family lived in Alabama at the time, but of course came home as soon as we heard the news that she had in fact made the transition to her heavenly home. As big Southern families do, we had a time of visitation and a proper funeral to celebrate a life well lived. Throughout these events, and in being with family, I felt such a peace I knew was from our Heavenly Father, and I really sensed people praying for us. Some of us gathered at the house the following day, and I walked to the room where she had died, and stood there in the doorway, choking back the emotion of the last few days. The space was empty of the hospital bed which had been there for some time, but her dresser and chest of drawers remained. Again, I was filled with such a sense of His presence, and I remember praying, sort of under my breath, “Lord, thank you for giving this family strength, and thank you so much for giving us Your peace.” As my eyes took in the room, they rested on a delicate looking perpetual calendar that I remembered giving to her some years earlier. The date had not been changed in some time, and thinking it should be turned to reflect the date she died, and wanting to touch this object which obviously had been loved by her, I crossed the room to move the wooden blocks.

Even though I had been the one to purchase this calendar for her many years before, I did not remember anything about it, certainly not that it had scripture, or any other design, etched on it. As my fingers reached to turn the block, my eyes fell on the scripture at the bottom of the calendar that read:

“The Lord gives strength to his people. The Lord blesses his people with peace.” Psalm 29:11.

I took in a deep, sharp breath – it was as if God was speaking directly to me, and saying, “Yes – I am here with you; have no doubt.” It was incredible to me, and almost took my breath away, that the words I had just prayed were imprinted on this object with which I was now interacting. Another unique thing about the calendar was that it had the design of small delicate looking flowers, almost identical to the design that the family had chosen to have placed on the corners of my Grandmother’s casket, because of her love of flowers, and ability to make almost anything she touched grow into something useful and beautiful. It was yet another sign that seemed to indicate God confirming His presence with something small and specific.

I hope I will never forget that moment, that day, and others like it. Yes, He is with us. He promised He would be. In Matthew 28:20, Jesus says that He is with us, to the end of the age. If someone is with you, it is even better than if they just know you. If someone comes to be with you during a time of need, it’s far better than if they only wish you well from a distance with a text message. To be with someone –is to come alongside and be there in their troubles and in their triumphs. Have you ever gone into a restaurant later than the rest of your party? It may look like you are alone, as the hostess looks at you as asks, “1 for dinner?” What a relief to spot your party and say, “I’m with them.” – I’m not alone, and I belong.

He is Emmanuel…God with us. We belong to Him. Whatever your circumstance, whatever you are walking through, He is with you, always, always, always. Try putting your name in that verse and know Jesus is saying it about you, even today. “I am WITH___________, to the end of the age.”

Rest in that today, and always.

The Theme of Thankful

I was in my 30s when I first began to notice that God would work with me along certain “themes” in my life. The first time I perceived this intense, focused teaching, the theme was “Create in Me the Heart of a Worshipper.” Mark had been called (I say Mark, but both are really called when a church calls), to be a worship pastor and we were off to serve our first church full time. Even though I had sung in church practically all my life, the Lord taught me things during that time, about being open and free in worship, about leading others, that were new to me. The next theme was “Be Generous” – not just with money and possessions, but with myself. I felt He was calling me to be open and generous with my time, as well as with material things, and to learn how to pour into people with love and sincerity. Following those years, the new theme was, “Be a Servant.” This was the natural progression from the “Be Generous” years. During this time, I felt the Lord calling me to take a step back, and do things, and serve in ways that were not “up front” ways, as I had always done. I had many opportunities to exercise this “Be a Servant” mentality during that particular time. After one season/theme is over, it is not that I don’t focus on it anymore, but that I am to incorporate that “lesson/theme” into my life from that point on. So when we moved into “Be Generous,” it was not that I stopped asking him to “Create In Me the Heart of a Worshipper,” but that was not the primary focus of the learning at that point. I’m sure many of you have experienced these same seasons of “themes,” as I have, or maybe you haven’t really thought about it, but with a little reflection you might see how God was working on a particular thing in your life.

Lately, I’ve felt the theme is “Be Thankful.” He is teaching me that gratitude is key to contentment and happiness. If I am continually grateful for all I have, it is hard to focus on what I don’t have. If I continually express gratefulness for my family, it’s hard to get “snippy” with them when they do something that irritates me! If I am grateful for my church, I’ll be less likely to complain about something not exactly to my liking. If I have an attitude of gratefulness in my business, it helps me to recognize that my abilities come from God, and he has given me a chance to do work that helps people, and helps to provide for our family. If I am thankful for my dishes, it makes unloading the dishwasher more tolerable, and on and on the examples could go, from the mundane to those of greater importance.

Often when our family is in a restaurant, and it is noisy and not conducive to saying a formal blessing, someone will ask, “Are we grateful?” Everyone at the table then gives their assent, that yes, we are thankful and blessed. It is a way of pausing, of reflecting even for just a moment, on the Giver of the food, and our gratefulness for it. I have started asking myself that question in other areas of my life too – Am I thankful? More and more the answer is “yes,” and when it is not “yes,” then I am reminded I still have some work to do.

In our lives, in our families, in our activities, in all that we do…

Are we grateful?

I AM

A couple of posts back, I focused on each of us knowing ourselves fully and completely, as we understand who we are in Christ, who God says we are and were from the beginning. We are loved, we are known, we are found.

Today I want to focus on who HE is, particularly as it relates to the phrase “I Am,” which he uses to describe Himself in many places throughout the Old Testament. As I began to do some research and study on this phrase, and Jesus’s “I Am” statements in the New Testament, I realized it is such a big topic and one that I cannot do real justice to in this short blog. However, I hope these thoughts will move us in the right direction, and certainly this topic can be explored more fully if anyone desires to do more study on it, to more fully appreciate the richness of it.

Most of you will be familiar with the story. Moses has an encounter with God in the desert in which God revealed to Moses what He was calling him to do, to free God’s people from slavery. Moses sees a bush that is burning, but not being consumed by the fire. As Moses approaches it, God tells him to take his shoes off, because he is on holy ground. What a thing to experience! When a bush talks to you, I guess you want to clarify what is happening. Moses asks, “Who are you?” God answers with “I Am Who I Am.” Simply put, “I Am” in the Hebrew speaks to the eternal, unchanging, and ever-present nature of God. I was (past), I am (present) and I will be (future).” We might think about it this way: He was at the beginning (Creator), He is now (Sustainer), He will be there in the future (Savior). Some sources say a more direct translation would be “I will be what I will be.”

He does not change, but as we change and understand Him more, He will be different things to us as we have different needs on our individual journeys. I believe he is saying to us today, “I AM…what you need, for this stage of your life, for this trial, for this place of joy, whoever and wherever you are – I AM.”

When God told Moses what He wanted Moses to do, Moses immediately came up with the reasons he was not suited for the job. In a message I heard by Steven Furtick, as he talked about this aspect of the Moses story, he used this phrase – “Moses said, ‘I’m not; God said, ‘I Am’.” We don’t have everything we need within ourselves. He takes what we are not, and replaces it with “I AM.” Whatever your issue, whatever your need, I AM. If you feel like you are not enough, I AM. When you are weary, I AM. When your heart is broken, I AM. When you are thankful, I AM. When you are filled with joy, I AM. When you are tempted, I AM. When you feel like giving up, I AM.

I AM, the God of your past, present and future.

Sewing and Sowing

Sewing and Sowing

The raggedy doll in the topmost part of the closet caught my eye as I was getting ready for the day ahead. My eyes rested upon it for several moments, as I remembered the hands that had stitched and stuffed the cloth so many years ago. I was about 4 or 5 years old when “MaMa,” my maternal grandmother, bought the cloth at Hancock Fabrics to make the special doll just for me. The pattern was already there, and like a pillow, it just had to be stuffed and then stitched around the edges. It was not particularly pretty, but even as a little girl I somehow knew it was more special than a store-bought one. Little red hearts were on the doll’s cheeks, and she had a head full of curly blond hair. A red dress with a yellow apron was also depicted on the cloth. I named her April, and she became one of those special objects that a child associates with love and security. Objects of childhood normally get discarded somewhere along the way, but I’ve always kept April, unable to bring myself to part with her, even during times of “decluttering” and getting rid of unused items.

As I stood there in the closet on this particular morning, I also thought about the many quilts my grandmother had stitched for her family throughout the years, some of which were also high on the shelf above. It was something she could do, a practical gift, and until the time her eyes grew dim and her hands could no longer thread the needle, she was working on a quilt of some kind. Having been a young adult during the heart of the Depression, she was one to save and stretch a dollar. She would always say, “Someday we may need some of these quilts.” So, it was her way of taking care of her family, even in her advanced years. Most of the time, she would just get scrap material from the fabric store because it was far less expensive. It was a hodgepodge of color and pattern, but somehow with the symmetry and accuracy in her quilting patterns, it always produced a beautiful result. She made all kinds of quilts, but my favorite by far was the “yo-yo” quilt. It was made up of hundreds of individual pieces of circular cloth, sewn around the border and then gathered in the middle so that it looked like a little wheel. The making of the individual pieces could pass a whole afternoon’s time, and I would often sit with her, trying my hand at the making of the yo-yos, feeling satisfied when one of mine was deemed good enough to be put in one of the many paper bags filled with them. Once there were enough individual pieces, she would sew them together at the edges, and then tack them down on a sheet or other covering. It was a beautiful thing; each stitch done with a sense of giving, giving what she could. Sewing and sowing. I can still see her now, sitting in her chair, sewing her fabrics and sowing into me and the rest of the family the sense of the powerful bond that only family can share and know.

When she passed away at the age of 98, her Bible she loved so well was a testimony of her life in and of itself. It was one that I had given her when I was just 18 years old, and worked at a bookstore as I went to school. The pages were so worn that it was about twice the size that it had been originally. As I held the Bible in my hands later, I thought about the fact that she did not just read it, but she let it read her. A woman of quietness and meekness, yet incredible strength and fortitude, she endured many hardships throughout her life. But her love of that Book made her who she was and who she became, and ultimately prepared her for her eternal home. It prepared her to sow into all of our lives; to sow into us what was most important.

Thank you, MaMa, for the many gifts you gave me, for your sewing and sowing. Your quilts still keep me warm on a cold winter’s night.

The one who sows righteousness reaps a sure reward. Proverbs 11:18

Whoever sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. 2 Corinthians 9:6

Found and Fully Known

For this post I have to go back to the very beginning – my beginning. From my earliest memories I knew that I was adopted. I give my parents a lot of credit for the way they handled this aspect of our adoption story, because I believe it is a difficult one for many parents. They simply always said the words to me that I was adopted, I was special, I was chosen, I was loved. So, these are truths I heard, and came to know in my heart and mind from the start. I don’t remember first coming to the realization that I was not biologically connected to my family and being unsettled by that fact, but rather I always had the sense, even as a small child, that God was watching out for me, and things were as they should be. My parents were fiercely devoted to me, and I to them, and our large extended family helped to create a firm foundation of security and belonging as I grew.

While I was growing up and into my early twenties, the knowledge I had was enough for me, and I honestly didn’t give more than occasional fleeting thoughts to the family I was connected to “somewhere out there.” Then, as my own children came along, and I looked into their faces and saw my own, I began to have a more intense curiosity about the family I came from, and the similarities we might share. I felt good about who I was, but I began to realize I only knew about myself in part. After years of being on adoption registries to hopefully make connection with someone from my family of origin, on August 28, 2018, I was contacted by an agency who told me someone who believed she was my sister had also contacted the agency. I immediately called her, and to make a long story short, she was in fact my sister on my Father’s side. It was like a whole new world opened up to me; I learned about the 3 brothers and 4 sisters on my Father’s side, and the 1 sister on my Mother’s side. They are all wonderful people, and by November of that year, I had been able to meet both birth parents and all my siblings. We have since started the process of forming relationships and making memories together. I look into their faces and see a reflection of my own, and when I look in the mirror now, I see a reflection of them too.

When I write a book one day, I will go into all this in much more detail, but was thinking about it in the context of understanding who we are in Christ. Just as I could not fully know who I was until I knew whose I was, whose imprint was on me, each one of us cannot see who we really are until we know who we are in Him. All those years, it was as though I saw through a clouded glass, but now I am able to see face to face. It is much the same when we realize who we are in Christ, who He says we are – we are loved, we are known, we are found. Each life precious, each life with meaning, each life a unique creation. It’s not that people who are standing outside of God’s grace don’t experience love, for families and other relationships are a reflection of that love, but we must clear the glass, so we can see and appreciate the picture as was intended to be.

CS Lewis states it this way:

“The more we let God take us over, the more truly ourselves we become – because He made us. He invented us. He invented all the different people that you and I were intended to be…It is when I turn to Christ, when I give up myself to His personality, that I first begin to have a real personality of my own.”

The story of God’s love and redemption for all of us was being written over 1600 years, as he conveyed though the prophets what was to come. Then came the ultimate reflection of God’s love in the form of a baby; He became small and vulnerable for us, and ultimately became sin, became a sacrifice, that we might know how wide, how deep, how great His love is for us. There is nothing he won’t do, no length He will not go to, no pit too deep, no place too far from His outstretched hand. He pulls us out of the miry clay and sets our feet on a Rock. He knows you fully, and loves you completely.

Rest in that, look in the mirror, and see yourself for who you really are.

Oh God, You are great, yet You became small

Your ways are unsearchable, yet You may be found

You are unfathomable, yet You may be known

You are everywhere, yet You are not far from each one of us

Oh God, that You would rend the darkness with your light

And lead us to You

Toward the Light

I went out on the back deck one morning, and my eye was drawn to a particular branch on a large tree, in the wooded area that is our backyard. The branch was a sort of “zigzag” shape, and I wondered how it could have grown that way. The branches around were substantially larger and clearly stronger, but there the misshapen branch was, smaller, but still growing toward the sky. One theory I heard is that when the tree was young, the branch was deprived of light, and grew in an odd way to try and get the light it needed through the canopy of trees. Anyone who has ever tended a plant knows that plants grow toward the light. The side exposed to the light will flourish and the plant must be turned around to give the other side the light it needs as well.
But the aforementioned branch, no matter how crooked, was still growing because it was connected to the trunk of that strong tree. I thought about our lives and how sometimes they are the same. Maybe our lives don’t look like we think they should, or thought they would. Maybe we’ve made choices that take us off that best “straight” path for us, and we’ve zigzagged a bit. Maybe our branch is not nice and straight, as we have struggled to find, and remain in, the light. The good news is, we can still grow, as long as we are connected to the Source of life and light. We’re told in 1 John 1:15 that God is light; in Him there is no darkness AT ALL (emphasis mine). In the same way that the imperfect branch continued to grow because of the strength of the mighty tree, we can grow because of the strength and power of our faithful God. We can move toward Him and his purpose for each one of us. There is no darkness in Him, no turning ourselves around to try and find the light, for if we remain in Him, we will continually experience His life giving light.
John 15:5 quotes Jesus as saying, “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” Remaining “in Him” – connected – is vital for the abundant life he wants to give each one of us. If we were to cut our zigzag branch off the tree, it would lay on the forest floor, and soon be sapped of the life it once had. Before long it would dry out, and decay, like things do when they are not connected to a source of life. Further in John’s gospel (8:12), Jesus says, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” He IS light, and promises we will have the light of life if we follow him. More than the light that filters through the trees and causes plants to shift one way or the other, he is THE LIGHT of the world. This light is for the whole world, but also personal enough to shine on you and me, crooked branches, imperfections, and all.
Allow time each day to sit in quietness; to read and meditate on His word, and allow Him to speak to you. There seems to be such a focus on (Eastern) meditation these days, where you attempt to empty your mind of all thoughts. In Judeo-Christian meditation, you fill your mind up – with promises of the faithfulness and character of God. Let your mind be renewed by these things. Remain “in Him.”
Connect to the Source of life and light, and you will grow. Seek Him, and allow His eternal truths to bind you to the only thing, the only Source, that can make you fully, truly alive.

Nothing Wasted

Today, the youngest child, the beautiful daughter, turns 18. Gone are the days of dress-up and make believe, as she now steps boldly into this “grown-up” world, full of hopes and dreams and plans. Macy Lynn Dowdy entered the world with a strong, lusty cry and brought so much joy to us from the very beginning. She seemed to have a song in her heart right from the start, singing almost before she could talk. But there was a time she stopped singing, and her song was almost replaced by silence, almost gone before the notes even found their melody. I thought it would be a while before I wrote about this particular part of her/our journey, but I asked her if I could share, and in her usual way of wanting to help others, she gave permission. Macy is one of the most empathetic people I know, and can see the beauty in almost anyone and any situation. But beginning around middle school, she could no longer find that beauty in herself, and struggled through several years of clinical depression. I will not go into the details here, but suffice it to say, it was a heart wrenching, gut wrenching time in her life and in the life of our family, in my life as her mother. While all the reasons are complex and not to be minimized, what we came to realize on the other side of the struggle was that the depression and despair was rooted in the spiritual, and not so much the biochemical. How she began to dig out of that deep crevice of despair, as we and others talked her down off the precipice, was nothing short of a miracle. Depression slowly turned to hope, and beauty rose from the ashes, as we prayed and struggled, and claimed God’s promises over her life.

I often think about and lament the fact that those years were stolen from her, but then I was reminded recently that nothing is wasted if we allow God to redeem it. This passage from the Eugenia Price novel, The Beloved Invader, spoke to me so powerfully.

Sometimes she felt that everything her husband believed was based on the simple fact that God will not waste anything if we give Him a chance to redeem it. She watched him lean toward the people, his penetrating eye, his expressive hands entreating them to believe that “He is not only a Redeemer of our sin, but He is a Redeemer of our circumstances as well. He will not waste a single problem, a single heartache, a single tear. Our God is a Redeemer God, and He stands minute by minute before us, inviting us to let Him have the sorrow, to let Him have the pain, to let Him have the disappointment. To trust Him to make something useful, something creative of every tragedy that darkens our lives.”

Nothing wasted – no tear, no heartache, no tragedy. He does not cause it, but he can use both joy and sorrow if we trust Him day by day. Maybe you are living with regret over “lost” years and situations, but let this truth wash over you, that He is a Redeemer God, and NOTHING is wasted.

Brave, by Macy Dowdy 2018

A Whole Lot of Gray

A Whole Lot of Gray

Have you ever read a story from the Bible, an account of the life of one of those less than perfect people God used to accomplish His purposes, and wondered how the person could have been so seemingly unaware of what God was doing at the time? When we read one of those stories from beginning to end, and see its conclusion, it seems to be tied up in a neat little bow, with lessons for us to learn in plain view – Moses freeing his people, Jonah ultimately obeying God and going to Nineveh, Noah building the ark – and on and on. It’s easy to see what the point was, what the plan was, how God used all the circumstances, and how it speaks to us today. In our own lives, we may see how God used certain circumstances after the crisis is over, after we have walked through the fire. It seems black and white to us then. But while we’re walking through it, it can seem like a whole lot of gray. Often, though, our situations don’t get wrapped up in a neat little bow, and we don’t understand why things remain the same, why our prayers seem to go unanswered. We stay in the gray. Sometimes we need to be reminded that the hardest work gets done in the gray, in the struggle, in the mess. We can rest in the knowledge that He is working in the gray, working ALL things together for our good (Romans 8:28). Even here, in fact, especially here, He is with us, forming and shaping us in those most difficult moments and trying circumstances.

A wise Pastor often said, “You have to leave room for the mystery of God.” In Isaiah 55:8-9, we are told that His ways are NOT our ways, His thoughts are NOT our thoughts, but His ways and thoughts are higher than ours. He calls us sheep, and Himself the Good Shepherd. He says His sheep know His voice, and they follow Him. While I have never been around sheep, I do have a dog, and am thinking the two are probably similar on a cognitive level. Now, I love this dog, but her understanding of my wants, desires, motivations, and concern for her can only go so far. She tries to run after a car every time she sees one as we are walking the neighborhood. Were it not for the tether of the leash held by her Master, she would have been run over long ago. She appears to have a short memory and some lessons have to be taught over and over again. Even with the best training, she will only be able to understand so much; she knows I love her, and she runs to me when I call, but her mind is not like my mind, her thoughts so unlike mine.

The relationship is much the same with our Heavenly Father; we do well to listen for His voice and remain in His presence, but we will never fully understand His mind, His ways, His greatness. Knowing He loves us and wants the best for us, should be enough for us to fully place our trust in Him. The Bible says that He calls us beloved, and He loves us with an everlasting love – a love for always, from before we were formed, through eternity. You can trust that kind of love, even if you don’t yet see the answers in black and white.

You can trust Him in the gray.

ORDER FROM CHAOS

The Beginning. God brought it all into being from nothingness. There is order in all he created, and we have only to look at the complexity of nature to see this functional and purposeful design. Our planet has an ebb and flow, a pattern. The earth is situated perfectly with its sun for life to flourish, and goes through the seasons with dependable regularity. Without this order, life as we know it would not be possible.

In the same way, the God of the universe has set parameters for us, to balance our lives, allowing us to flourish like the rest of His creation, as we follow His Ways. There is a Way to live that pleases Him, and it begins with trusting Him, and then following Him. This is the “stepping- off” point, the necessary marker in the ground that says, “I am His.” After we have taken the first step toward Him by simply believing and placing our trust in Him (Whosever calls upon the name of the Lord will be saved. Romans 10:13), He promises the Holy Spirit will lead us into all Truth (John 16:13). Galatians 5:22 tells us the Fruit of the Spirit is Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Gentleness, and Self-Control. It is through these qualities that others see evidence of God’s transforming power in our lives, the evidence of the Fruit of the Spirit. Can others see these attributes in your life and mine, day to day? Does the “fruit” on our branches look and taste like the life-giving fruit in Galatians 5:22?

I am a pragmatic person. While I enjoy philosophy, theology, and beautiful thoughts and ideas, often when I hear something meaningful, with the power to be life changing, I think, “So what does this mean in my daily life – what can I DO differently – how do I apply it?” You might be asking yourself something similar. How do I demonstrate the kind of character, and live the kind of life that shows this Fruit, and how can I get there?”

One practical suggestion is to seek a Mentor, whether you are young or old. I have noticed a trend, particularly online, to seemingly glory in the fact that we don’t “have it all together.” This almost seems to be the norm – frequent use of the term “hot mess” comes to mind! I am certainly not implying that any of us will ever achieve perfection, but I do believe God wants us to prioritize our lives so that we are filled with purpose to produce the kind of fruit that shows we belong to Him. We all have days we struggle, are not very productive, or feel derailed by our circumstances, but God does not want us to stay there. This should be the exception, not the rule, of our daily lives. The flip side of the “online” coin is that often times, people post their “best selves”- how they wish to be perceived, but it may be far from the reality of their daily lives. Mountain tops and valleys are part of the human experience, but day to day existence is usually lived out somewhere in between. While it’s good to share our struggles, insecurities, and weaknesses with each other, in the context of community, we should focus on becoming women (and men) of excellence. We are encouraged to look to those who are living out the “God life,” who are walking closely with Christ, who demonstrate this fruit in abundance. Hebrews 10:24 tells us to “consider how to stir up one another to love and good works.” Seek a mentor who stirs you up to be better, to do better, a mentor who “opens her mouth in wisdom, and has the law of kindness on her lips.” Proverbs 31:26.

While we are urged to seek out this type of mentorship, we are conversely warned about aligning ourselves with those who participate in foolish talk. Ephesians 5 admonishes us: “do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is…be filled with the Spirit.” Additionally, Paul tells us, “be careful how you live, not as unwise, but as wise.” In these days, we can all get caught up in, or even obsessed with, the addictive world of social media, with its memes and one-line zingers and philosophies, to the point of neglecting or diminishing the importance of our own families. Don’t let the counterfeit take the place of the real thing, the best thing. Be on the alert for any mindset that creeps in, which implies that we are all just muddling through this thing together, and none of us have any of the answers, or that all answers have the same merit. While we will never have all the answers this side of Heaven, we are not just floundering with no guidance or hope of figuring out what we are doing. The Bible says in 2^nd Peter 1:3 that He has given us “everything we need for life and godliness.” Everything we need. We have all the instruction we need in those pages, all the instruction we need for living lives that please Him, in His Word, and through studying the lives of people who follow Him closely. This does not mean there will not be challenges, struggles, and heartache, sometimes on a daily basis in this journey, but it is about following His Way, so that we might be filled with the peace only He can give.

Many of you are familiar with Proverbs 31, and the woman who is the subject of the Proverb. One of the most powerful phrases in the Proverb says that the woman, “Looks well to the ways of her household.” Friends, this should be our heartbeat and our first priority. The people in your household are indeed your first ministry, and working toward ordering things to make life pleasant and calm for all within, a reflection of God’s love, is a privilege and a calling. This does not mean you are responsible for everything, or that you are aiming at some unattainable kind of perfection, it just means that you are intentional about taking steps to make sure your family has what they need to survive and thrive, and to grow into the people God created them to be. Some of those steps include giving children responsibilities as well. This is part of “training up a child in the way he should go.” (Proverbs 22:6) When you give children responsibilities, you are not only helping yourself, but are helping the child to grow and teaching him or her that in a family, we all contribute. Our Proverbs 31 woman clearly had help to accomplish all that she did!

Once the needs of our own households are taken care of, then we can “reach out our hands to the poor and needy (Proverbs 31:20). Sometimes, there is a tendency to get our priorities reversed; we let our homes suffer because of outside obligations or relationships, however noble those obligations may be. Rightly aligning our priorities may mean saying “no” to some things we have said “yes” to in the past. Don’t be afraid to weed the garden and get rid of things that don’t need to be there anymore. Saying “no” to some obligations means you have the margin to say “yes” to the right ones. When our thinking and priorities are placed in the right order, life then becomes more peaceful and “manageable.” Order will replace chaos; you’ll find more time for the most important things, and discover the path, the Way, becomes clearer.

Take a deep breath, you have everything you need.